I’m not sure how to feel right now. The Bar exam begins in 2 days and I honestly don’t feel calm, but I’m also not in a full-blown panic. I’m antsy. I can’t quite put into words the exact feeling coursing through me right now, but I can tell you that I feel the weight of the world on my shoulders tonight. Definitely questioning if I know-know everything, or if I just know everything. Because, I’m not entirely sure it’s ever enough.
There are 37 subjects on this exam. Did you know that? Someone asked me today “do you feel ready?” And my only response to her was, “well, there’s 37 subjects on this test.” But that’s all I needed to say because she responded with “well, damn.” Yes, girl. Damn indeed.
There’s exceptions to exceptions and we’re required to recognize laws at the drop of a hat. It seems easy enough in practice, when you can just tell your client that you’ll look into the matter and get back to them. But under a time-pressured exam, it’s entirely different. I have to figure out a way to let my examiner know that I truly understand the law, with around 600 words per essay (of which, there are 12). And the best advice I was given is something along the lines of “Just keep moving forward and fake it if you have to because you simply will not know it all.”
I’m trying to figure out how to tackle this experience, hoping to convey these emotions and internal monologue. Before I even walk into this exam, I’m doing all I can to clear my mind of the stress and concern caused by the hundreds (yes, hundreds) of hours of preparation I’ve put into gearing up for this three-day test. At this point, I want you to know that there’s still time to review, but there’s nothing left to learn. I promise you, I’m racking my brain trying to figure out what else I can do, but I’m drawing a blank. You’ve put in the time. You feel bruised and battered, brain a little worse for wear, but it will get you through this.
This exam is just that – a test. At this point in your education, you’ve taken hundreds of exams. Each hurdle got you here. You’ve dreamt for this opportunity. Don’t shy from it; go forth and conquer! It’s only three days, in the span of thousands. This experience will not break you. Lay everything you’ve got into this exam because knowing you put the aggregate of your energy and effort into it is all you can truly ask of yourself.
Good luck to you all and may the curve be ever in our favor!
