This topic has been on my mind quite a bit, as of late, but I simply had no clue how to address it. While on this healthy journey, I’ve begun to realize the more pivotal people in my life. These are the people who challenge me to be better, kinder, happier and who can appreciate me for everything I am – all the time. They rally around me and make me feel loved, lucky and ever-so-blessed. If you are one of them, I’m sure you know it – as I am one to spill love all over you! I’m going to point out a few people specifically, because of how influential they have been, always and especially lately.
First we have my wonderful boy-fran!
He is just about the best man I have ever met in my life (second only to my Grandpa). Angel can make me laugh when all I want to do is cry, I swear – his arms were made for the sole purpose of being wrapped around me and he loves me with a fierceness that I have never known from anyone. He is not my rock, but rather my island. I can run to him and be at peace, always. The best thing about him is his smile, it’s contagious. He provides me with serenity and constantly challenges me to let go of the small stuff. We are both Taurus signs and fight like the dickens, but we somehow manage to keep it together, constantly in sync with one another. Choosing him was not a fluke, but rather a push in the right direction from two other wonderful people in my life.
Allow me to introduce Honour and Laura.
Now, I chose this picture for 2 reasons.
A.) We are happy and smiley, though Honour is not looking at the camera. 😐
B.) This picture was taken the last time we three got together…in 2008.
This is a testament to how crucial some relationships can be. For me, these beautiful ladies are my true north, the reason I stay grounded and a huge reason for why I am the woman I’ve become. Let me be clear, I have only 8 best girl friends. The two ladies above have been by my side since high school, the other 6 sisters of mine met me in college.
Laura and I fell into step our Sophomore year and never looked back. Though we went to separate colleges (she’s the reason I ended up choosing Baylor) and shared infrequent visits over the years, we have never failed to be friends. She was there for every tortured phone call about dreading finals and hating my major, to the heart-breaking moments when we each thought we’d missed out on true love. Laura is passionate, caring, kind and the gentlest person I have ever met. This postcard enthusiast and lover of Indian food has a charismatic spirit and the greatest snorts. She brings out the kid in me and never fails to lift me up when I feel so very broken.
My dearest Honour, she’s a whole other type of story. I loathed everything about this quick-witted, beautiful and sassy young lady from the moment she walked into my Freshman English class. Everything about her (for no freaking reason, whatsoever!) pissed me off. Perhaps it was the way my guy friends drooled all over her, or the notion that she may be smarter than me (she is, in so many ways)…but something about her just rattled me. The truly funny thing about this? Honour hated me too. From day one, but one day…we clicked. Our friendship blossomed in our Sophomore year as well but didn’t truly solidify until our Senior year, where she let me lean on her for all the tough stuff and I bailed her out of a few sticky situations. She is a prime example for the saying “Friends bail you out of jail, but best friends are sitting next to you in the cell.” Yep, that was us. [Thank goodness, we never wound up in jail.]
We talk all the time, despite not having seen each other in years. Time does not matter to true friends. It’s simply moments that pass by, allowing us to grow apart in distance, yet closer in soul. I am always thinking of the people who have profoundly impacted my life and none have done more for me than my friends.
I know this was long, but I have thought long and hard about this. You see, relationships are our greatest ally and weakest link. We tie our hearts to other people, our happiness lies in the essence of another person. Recently, I was speaking to both of these girlies about love and expectations. I came to realize that we all experience different sorts of love and for those bibliophiles like us, we feel like we’ve been left wanting. Our expectations of a partner or friend are held to incredible standards and, more often than not, we wind up disappointed.
What we need to do is take stock of the important ones in our life at this moment. Make sure they know they are loved and appreciated. And the others? Those who have abandoned us, walked away or simply lost touch…they should stay gone. I’m not telling you to burn bridges, but I am saying that you should move on. Those who’ve walked away did so for a reason. If fate should see them back in, then welcome that person with open arms. This is healthy.
Part of becoming fit is not only strengthening the body, but the mind and soul as well. Get in touch with yourself. Find out what you need, want and feel. Stick to your guns and go after what you love. Keep up with your support system and remember to listen as much (if not more) than you speak. This is a lesson where I am still very much a novice. I’m learning to be a better friend and striving to be a better “me.”
Cultivate healthy relationships and prosper in them. When you surround yourself with beautiful, wonderful people, life is such a joy and (from my own personal experience) the problems that were once mountains, are much easier to climb.
How have your friendships impacted your life recently?
How is your journey to a healthier, sexier you going?