I could not think of anything funnier today than sharing my law school thoughts in Sandra Oh medium.
At this point in my 3L year, I basically take turns dragging/being dragged across the finish line for various deadlines. We’re going to graduate, but it’s been a helluva ride so far. I’m tired. You’re tired. Our friends and family keep saying we look ragged. [Thanks, y’all.] It’s been a rough go, but we are almost there! With midterms next week, and this outrageous Texas weather, I’m about damn ready to raise the flag.
Every day is a struggle. I’ve put myself through nearly a decade of college and graduate school courses to attain this law degree. The Hydra in my life is both light and dark. The volume of deadlines is practically suffocating, but I feed off the drive and direction those deadlines afford. It’s a weird place to stand, I know. I figure attorney’s deadlines never cease, so best get comfortable with them now.
We get it. We too were once annoyingly happy and not-so-jaded. That’s all different now. We’ve seen things. The late nights, the jail calls, client interactions, and the real world application has us all feeling a little less superhero and a lot more cynical.
The number of exams, quizzes, case briefs, research and writing segments, and mandatory attendance also kind of beat the hell out of us. Sorry for being crabby. You’re our future colleagues. We want you to succeed, but can you just not throw parties in the library study rooms? That’d be great. Thanks.
This is still the funniest thing to me. Several people I know refuse to speak about post-bar plans. My dream job is split between becoming a law clerk for a federal judge and working for the Federal Public Defender’s Office. These applications are now submitted and I’m playing the waiting game.
I don’t keep these facts a secret. Why? Because I want my colleagues to think of me if they hear about a vacant position! I have to keep job hunting until I land one! It’s prudent planning.
I frequently let other attorneys know about great colleagues who would fit in at their firms. There’s no harm in helping someone else with a leg-up.
Be kind, people.
Pretty much the feeling I get when my thesis advisor meets with me. She’s epic and I never feel worthy enough to be in her presence. #RoleModel
Everything about her is brilliant. How did I get so damn lucky with these amazing mentors?
The little inconveniences grind me much more as of late. Hand dryers not working. Highlighters dying. Dishes not being put in the dishwasher. I actually had to jump in front of the automatic doors this week to get into my office building. -.- Everyone has these kinds of days. Despite me fuming about them now, I recognize, they too, shall pass.
Yesterday was an incredibly hectic day. I completed an MPT (more on how to ace these, later) and met with my writing professor. Next came my meeting with my thesis advisor…where I had to explain that I basically undid my own research. No joke. My research led me down a rabbit hole, where I discovered the “legal” issue I thought I was researching was actually not an issue at all. Time wasted. Feeling vexed. Then I met with another professor because I’m worried about wrapping my head around commercial law. All of these tasks were completed before 1pm. The day was intense, followed by a series of classes and more notes, more questions, more resentment for these four walls and the seemingly endless hurdles still left to jump through before graduation…
All these things are running around in my head and I felt you needed to know you are not alone. Even though everything feels like it’s on fire, with no fire hydrant in sight, there is a finish line. Treat yourself to a meal out. Have a drink – or two. Take the mental break you need and sit at olive garden with a group of friends for hours, gorging yourself on breadsticks and peach tea. Do whatever you must to get yourself back to center. This is the middle of the semester and you’re
When all else fails – DANCE IT OUT. I regularly dance – in the aisles at Target, on my way into the gym, in the kitchen while prepping dinner. I dance everywhere. A little shimmy is good for the soul. Trust me.
I hope your semester is going splendidly. If not, there’s still time to turn it around. If you’re struggling, reach out to a professor, friend, or counselor. Go out there and give law school everything you’ve got!